Monthly Archives: March 2012

When u think you know someone, it’s $$$ that stands between you.

I have first hand experience at this today, and I don’t like it. However, it is the truth. Sometimes the truth hurts.

Money rules everyone. People are greedy. Reading this, you may think you’re the exception to the rule, but are you?

Everyone has bills to pay, riches to earn, and things they want to be able to have, or to do, in their future.

Many of us, I think a lot more than people may think, enjoy helping someone without getting paid. At least, that is the type of person I am.. If I truly help someone because of talent I may inherently have, I’m always happy to do so.. My thanks is enough by seeing the smile on someone’s face that needed help.

I’d like to believe, and always wanted to believe, that if I help a bunch of people, some day, someone will help me too..

Today, I got slapped with reality, and I got slapped really hard by it.

I could elaborate into details, but that doesn’t take away from the point, so let’s stick with the basic points…

I was working pro bono for someone, helping them with what it is they need, without talking money, expecting that if I needed similar help, they’d be there for me.  I found out today, that is not the case…

Ever see one of those carnival dunk tanks? Where the person sits on a bench, you throw a ball, and they get dunked?

..that is what this person needs to have done for them. They need a fresh, cold water, dunk into a tank to wake up.

I realize I’m beating around the bush here, and I don’t mean to do that, as much as I’m trying my darnest to not publically identify the guilty.

In a nutshell, this is what happened…

1) I did about $1800 worth of work for someone

2) I asked them to help me with a project I was working on, and see what they could do

3) The labor involved in the $1800 I provided them works out to about 35 hours of my talents, abilities, and cost to provide..

4) I needed something that would have also worked out to be about 35 hours of their own talents, abilities, and costs to provide…

5) Fair deal, so I thought.

6) Met with them. They initially quoted me a non-friendly $8000 before the meeting, and then reduced it down to $5,000 after the meeting.

…here is where things get fun..

7) Two days later, this person revises their quote, and goes “Yeah, I’ve re-decided after the meeting, that what it is, I can help you with, is actually worth $12,800 and here is 10 different sweet reasons why you need to pay me for it.

This was a semi-friend that did this to me.  I’m speechless.   How could you possibly quote $8,000, meet with me,  then quote $5,000, wait two days and up the ante to $11,800 ?

I already know the answer to my question.

ANSWER: Because you are in a position to do exactly that.. you did it, because you can.

Just because you can, and are able to do something, doesn’t mean you should.

This type of thing that goes on with people, in business negotiations shouldn’t be hidden. When a wrong has happened, speak about it. You don’t have to identify the guilty parties, but surely you are in the right to share the problem publicly on your blog..

Which is what I am doing, exactly now.

The world is rough enough. It’s even worse when you can’t trust friends (ok semi-friends) which are people you trust to be there for you, when you were already there for them.

So I learned a hard lesson tonight, against my will, which is that you shouldn’t put too much trust in anyone.. Even those people you think are close acquaintances of yours.

Which, in short translation means.. This is not a win-win situation now. Now it becomes a lose-lose situation. You upped your price more than double.. see where I’ll be later when you actually need me.

Money doesn’t rule all here, and now I certainty won’t trust you again.

So Mr. Greed, thanks for your nonsense quote. I’ve now learned that you’re not someone on my short list of people who I’ll ever go to again. Take your greed and stuff it..

Life is funny. Out of every 100 people, there is probably only 2 or 3 that are decent.  I see that more and more everyday.

Life is suppose to be about give and take. It just seems that some people want to always take, without giving anything back.

Whatever. I’ll still manage. But to Mr. Idiot out there that took advantage of my goodwill… you have what is coming to you. With that attitude, and something bad happens, it is not me that caused it. It’s you that deserved it.

..enough said..

Best wishes to the rest of you. Please don’t let life let you become this type of financial monster where you have to lose friends and acquaintances for money, it just isn’t worth it.

Be dynamic and learn to adapt in order to survive. GET RICH QUICK!

 

Surviving this depression requires you to be dynamic and have the ability to adapt to this economic downturn (who are we kidding, it’s more than a downturn, it’s a slow but steady collapse).

Many people reading this probably have full or part-time jobs. Problem is, most people are having a hard time just keeping their cell phones working, rent paid, and groceries bought.  You feel wealthy when you are able to fill up your gas tank.  When it comes time, if we’re lucky, we have a few dollars left over so we can rent a DVD, buy some stuff at Walmart, or order a pizza on Friday night.

What happened to get rich quick? .. There is a lot of false promises on the internet, but those that are attempting getting rich quick are using deceptive marketing tactics in order to rob you of your hard earned money.

Get rich quick marketers use marketing taglines like the following:

 “I can show you how to make $21,000 in the next 21 seconds for only $21.00 !”

If there was an easy method to get rich quick, do you really think they’d be spending their time to tell YOU how to do it? Absolutely not!  They are attempting to get rich by selling false opportunities to suckers who send in $20 or $30 to buy into the scam..

So what is the answer?

First of all, don’t look into get-rich-quick schemes unless you are willing to be let down.. hard..

Instead, create something of value that no one else has..  Do you have a certain talent or persona that you can create or share on the internet that people will see value in?  There are plenty of ways to share your knowledge on the internet and get paid by doing so..

For instance, if you are an expert at making scrambled eggs, then make a Youtube video doing it, and do it with a smile. If your video is that great, and your method is worthwhile, you’ll get thousands of visitors, and you can gain the benefit of advertising Google Adwords ads that pay you a few cents every time someone clicks one..

What about creative writing? Do you have the ability to put words and feelings into print, much like I am doing with this blog? If so, consider starting up your own blog. It’s definitely not going to make you get rich quick, but it surely will make you a few cents a day while you are away, if people are reading your posts.

What about photography? Have a camera? Get some great shots and find a way to list then on www.gettyimages.com

If you are computer savvy, there are hundreds of people in your neighborhood that could use your help, even for a $25 fee.  Share what you know, with your neighbors who are lost and could use some assistance.  Perhaps they don’t know how to operate their computer or install the latest updates. What if they want to create a website and don’t know where to begin?  Lend your talents for a fair price, and that becomes a win-win situation.

Times are tough. The economy in 2012 is the worst that it has ever been recently.

How can someone like you survive it?  I’ll tell you, for free. Make $20 here, and $100 there, and that  is all it takes to stop you from being sucked into the undercurrent of the financial collapse we’re witnessing.

Opportunities you may never have considered before when times were great..  are paramount to financial survival now.  Take the time to recognize your financial situation, and what you can do to mitigate your circumstances. You’ll be glad you made a few dollars while sharing your talents..

This is not a time to be shy. If you have something to offer, then offer it loudly. Get those contracts and jobs. Work hard. Many people out there that are getting laid off are puzzled on what to do next.  Don’t be them.  Work with what you’ve got.

Writing this particular article was easy, but difficult at the same time. I’m aware of what is going on around me in society, and it’s hard to admit. Everyone needs to think about survival these days and making an extra $100 a month can make or break someone.

I’d really appreciate it if you would take a few seconds to share your comments, I’d be interested in hearing them.

Best of luck to you, and your family. We’re all going through it in one way or another.

Anger & Animosity are Chemical Reactions You don’t Need

This is a frequent phenomenon, and it is understandable.  People get angry, they have animosity toward other people, and they do illogical things in the heat of the moment. “Hang up the phone, stop the conversation, get upset and walk out of the room”

This is counter productive to yourself, and the person you hold the animosity towards.  When you are old enough to read, all of us should have been given an owners / operator manual on how to be human.  That sounds too technical and stupid – the moment I wrote it, I realize that…

..but it doesn’t make it any less true.   When we feel emotion, what seems most important to us at that moment? The way we feel. ..here is where things go wrong.

If you’re human, like me, you’re guilty of this too, all of us are..

When we feel anger & animosity, we feel it must be for a very good reason. We’re offended, upset. Someone has caused us to feel this way, and life was fine before that happened. Therefore, we must lay blame. We must hold someone accountable for stirring these emotions in us.

What if we’re not perfect though? Most people will say “I know I’m not perfect”.

So then.. when you are angry, and feel animosity towards someone.. just because it feels right to be upset. Does it truly mean you have the right to be upset? If there was a judge and jury of 12 people investigating the reason you were upset, would they agree with you?

This is beginning to sound like a riddle, so before it does, let me explain.

When we get upset and feel anger and animosity, more often than not, someone has said something that is outrageous, insulting, or plain stupid in our minds. “How could they say such a thing? After all I’ve done…”  or we qualify it with things like “…if they are so stupid not to see or understand..”

For a moment, step outside of your mind and your body and realize the problem. To do that, will require you entertain some what IF’s  (and no one likes to entertain what “if’s” but for the sake of understanding this, take the time to try this out)..

1. What IF the person simply failed to communicate what it is they were trying to say, and did it poorly. While their honest intentions were true, and they really didn’t mean harm. It simply came out the wrong way? After all, the person that caused you to feel this way is also human, and prone to making mistakes of their own. We all make mistakes, whether it be intentional or unintentional. BE READY TO GIVE A PERSON A BREAK. (That includes whether or not you feel they deserve it at the moment)

2. What IF they are actually right? Just because you don’t initially believe they are right as a first instinct, doesn’t make you right. Your emotions, your anger, your animosity are triggered. You know how you feel. Surely you feel this way for a reason. But what if THEY ARE RIGHT, AND YOU ARE WRONG?

3. What if their life situation (health, finances, etc) has cornered them, and made them act out this way, and there is a bigger issue they aren’t telling you?

4. You have a brain, and a physical body. When you feel emotion, can you name 13 different chemicals in your brain that are released and flowing within your cerebral cortex? Probably not, even I can’t. But we feel it.

—-

By now, you’re probably annoyed and irritated and wondering “what is the point here?”

Here it is…

When you’re feeling emotional, there is a 99% chance you’re acting illogical.  This isn’t saying you’re wrong, or the other person is wrong. It simply means, while your brain is being overrun with chemical reactions due to severe stress, you are not thinking logically.

What is the solution?

Stop thinking! It’s that simple. Stop reacting! It is that simple.

Leave the situation, go calm down, and come back to it when you are thinking clearly again.

You are your own worst enemy when you’re heart is beating faster and you’re full of emotion, ideas and thoughts are running through your mind, while you’re trying to deal with a difficult situation that is upsetting you.

If you come back, “tomorrow”, and the situation is equally difficult, then perhaps you were the person that was fully right before this happened. But while you are in the heat of the moment, you don’t get to have the opportunity of being right under any circumstance.

So with all of the forgoing being said..

Anger & Animosity are Chemical Reactions You don’t Need