This happens every single day, and it is time someone points it out.  You’ve probably done this, I’ve done this, and everyone you know usually does this…

 

 

 

 

Have you ever found yourself in these silly predicaments?

1. You hate your job, so you start looking at job ads and sending resumes to them
Wrong approach.

2. Your bank account is low, the bills are mounting, so you cut back on your cellular phone plan or lower your TV channel package.
Wrong approach.

3. Sales at work are dwindling, to get new customers, you lower your prices, put on a major SALE and advertise.
Wrong approach.

4. You had a major fight with a friend, your boss, your spouse, so you decide to go out drinking on Friday night to calm your nerves.
Wrong approach.

By now you’re probably wondering how all of these solutions to these types of problems are wrong.  See, told you, people always react stupidly to life’s problems. While all of those reactions seem like they help the situation, all they actually do, is contribute to the problem.

How can that be? You might say…

It always helps to take a particular situation, exaggerate the same “rule of thumb”, to see how the point remains the same. Let’s take a look at #5 now:

5. The titanic ship is sinking, so you grab a bucket and start bailing water.
Wrong approach.

AHA! Now you’re beginning to understand.  Our first instinct when life presents problems is to look for a quick, and easy solution.  That only works for a short time, and all it does is set you up to receive similar amount of problems in the future.

Let’s look at what your reactions just caused:

1. You start looking at job ads and sending resumes to them, you land a job, but now your new job has an entire different set of problems. You hate your co-workers, the job description doesn’t match what you had expected. Your boss is a jerk, and the company is about to be bankrupt next year.
This reaction created more problems.

2. You cut back on your cellular phone plan or lower your TV channel package.  However next month, you went over you cell phone minutes and got charged $35 extra which negated the savings you were expecting.  Since you had less channels on TV, you found yourself at the local video store paying to rent movies. You even bought a few DVD’s to tie you over. Nothing was on TV, so you went out with friends instead, it ended up costing you money.
This reaction created more problems.

3. To get new customers, you lower your prices, put on a major SALE and advertise.

While sales volume increases, your cost of goods sold (remember that term from accounting class?) has increased.  The cost of the advertising in addition to the lower sales price has basically caused you to break even.  Once you stop the sale, you find that your sales dwindle off, and you’re back to square one. All you did was waste time, energy, and effort into a short term solution that didn’t fix a darned thing.
This reaction caused more problems.

4. You decide to go out drinking on Friday night to calm your nerves.

This may have calmed your nerves, but next week you have a different fight, with the same person, about a different issue. What you’ve solved is nothing really. All you’ve done is put yourself in a situation where the same peril can happen to you again.
This reaction can cause more problems.

5. You begin bailing buckets of water on the titanic as it sinks, and you soon realize, all you did was exhaust yourself. The ship still sunk, but now your out of energy to survive in the cold water, and you perish.  You can’t save a sinking ship, so stop trying.
This reaction caused more problems.

If you’ve read this far, then you want real answers.

I will provide you some ideas, and I’d love to hear your own comments.  Whenever we come up with solutions, it is important to STOP. THINK. DISCOVER. PLAN. EXECUTE

Abbreviated that is S.T.D.P.E  (which isn’t a catchy word, so you’ll just have to get past it)

 

Here are better solutions to the previous 5 examples:

1. You hate your job.

CORRECT: Start talking to people in your industry. This is best done with strangers. People who don’t even know your name. This way you maintain confidentiality so it won’t get back to your current job. Your friends and family won’t judge you and scoff “oh look, John hates his job”.

Read newspapers, do research, network, get the information you need before making a decision on what to do, where to do it, and how to do it.

What’s that? You found out in an industry journal that some massive company is branching out into a new area that you have expertise in? Great.  Scope out the job. Read their history. Find someone that worked there BEFORE, who can talk about the place.

I can’t think for you, but some of you might be saying “Well, how could I possibly find someone that use to work there?”

Think about it. Resumes are posted online.  Websites like linkedin.com carry histories of where people use to work.  Old forum posts from 5 years back might have someone signing their name with a title of the company and then they are signing their name with their new signature.    If there is a will, there is a way, create your own ways.

People that no longer have any ties to companies they use to work have volumes of helpful information that could tell you whether or not it would be a great place for you to work. Heck, people even post publicly about it. “I use to work at XYZ” – they brag about it like credentials on the “About Us” page of a website.

Ask them how the company was doing before they left. Why did they leave? Are they sorry they left? Would they ever consider returning?

2. Your bank account is low, the bills are mounting.

Really? Is your financial situation going to greatly improve by lowering your cell phone bill or TV channel package to only save yourself $50 a month?  Is that the real issue here, you’re only short $50 and your life would be so much better saving that tiny bit of money?

“But it will help, at least right now” you say.

CORRECT: Come up with a long term plan of action FIRST.  Begin executing that longer plan to get you out of this long term problem.  When time permits, (and time always does permit) you can make small changes SECOND.

Obviously your income isn’t matching the expenses you want.  Most people will say “you want too much, you’re living outside of your means.”  While that is true, a better idea is to INCREASE your means.  Raise your income.  That’s better than just lessening the desires for things you want.

3. Sales at work are dwindling, to get new customers, you lower your prices, put on a major SALE and advertise.

Ask yourself first: Why are sales dwindling?  What is the real issue here?

Some people may say “well XYZ is taking our business”.  Well if you are selling the exact same products as XYZ and you lower your prices, don’t you think XYZ will take notice and lower theirs as well, until someone gives in?

CORRECT: Perhaps the product or service you are selling is the real issue.  Perhaps you need to find some products that are EXCLUSIVE to your store.  Maybe you can create a value added service that XYZ competitor doesn’t have.  This is the longer term solution that will help your business.

Customers don’t always shop on price. Often they will shop based on novelty, by recommendation, or perceived value (not just price).  Look and think outside of the box.  If you come up with some real creative ways to reach these customers that XYZ is unable (or unwilling) to copy, then you’ll have people clamoring for your product or service.

4. You had a major fight with a friend, your boss, your spouse, so you decide to go out drinking on Friday night to calm your nerves.

What happens the following Monday? Perhaps another major fight. What will be your solution? Next Friday go out drinking with friends again?

The question is why did the fight occur in the first place? The “details” of the fight isn’t the answer to this question either.

But why?  Who was tense? Who was intolerant. Look at the bigger picture. The details themselves are trivial. Problems happen all the time, that’s normal, and everyone knows that.. But for a fight to erupt means:

CORRECT: Someone is stressed.  Maybe someone simply has a bad personality defect.  Can something be done to lower that person’s stress load, so they are less likely to be so tense?  In the case of a personality defect, you can’t change the person, so maybe it is time to get away from them.

5. The titanic is sinking

CORRECT: Grab a life jacket, and get off the boat as safe as your best options permit. Did I really need to say this?

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People always react stupidly to life’s problems.

You don’t need to react stupidly.

Think before you act. Plan ahead for a longer term solution and get the process rolling FIRST.

When you get time (and you will get time) you can do some short term solutions SECOND.

This is the key to avoiding reoccurring pitfalls and traps in life. It will hinder similar problems plaguing you in the future.

Your comments?  I hope you have some. I’ve given you plenty of food for thought here.

Other people want to hear what YOU have to say too.